For those of you who don't know - and judging by my readership, it's not a lot - today is the Hoboken Day Parade. It's a faux St Patty's Day for all you micks and us non potato eating clowns. I for one am certain that today is just going to be another in a long line of what 'I' like to 'call' a 'shitshow'. [Damnit, I thought I had that under control.]
So the other day I looked at the roommie and told her, 'No matter what I say, don't let me start a fire.' [There is a fire place in here, I'm not just going to have a barrel fire in the middle of the apt...] Well last night as we're cleaning I have an epiphany and shout 'OOOOOOOH, let's make a fire!' And she proceeds to tell me that I already told her NOT to let me do that. I didn't even wait til I was drunk to have a bad idea this time...With that in mind I'd like to make a few more for the day.
~One of the people I invited here will break something. [Who am I kidding? It's going to be me...]
~I know a person who will attempt to urinate on my clothes again. [Assuming he's here later]
~I will again attempt to get a fire in the fire place.
~I'll break a dining room chair.
~If there just so happens to be a 17 y.o. girl in the vicinity, I will unknowingly strike up a conversation with her. Then I'll be royally disappointed when I realize it and make the decision to talk to her over the course of the next few months or just let it go.
~The fucking toilet is going to ruin us. I might as well just throw on my Mario overalls now cuz I'm going to be dealing with that shit alllllll day.
~We're going to run out. We sat here last night and couldn't think of who all would possibly be here. So we're going to end up with like 100 people and be the place to be.
~We're going to bring up random be-hot-ches from the street.
~Someone I don't care to see today is going to call me to see what I'm doing - maybe wanna hang out. I'll give in. Cuz I'm a masochist.
~My plan is to pass out by 3PM. Up at 8PM. Late night movie - 2 or 3AM. But I know I'm going to make it to like 7 and that'll be my night. Then I'll miss out on the late night debauchery.
~EVERYONE involved with the shoot tomorrow is going to be really banged up.
~I'm going to forget that Morty is at the Pitt-UConn game. Even though it's only two hours from now.
~Someone is going lock themselves in the bathroom and pass out on the floor.
I think that's enough for now. I wish I could make prop bets for the day....I'd get rich off this shit. I'ma go make green pancakes and crack a beer. ONE.
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